I found a letter I wrote to myself a year ago

Dear Tania:

First of all I would like to thank you for being a warrior. You have endured many adversities with your head held high and a smile on your face.  Don't allow your mind to take the best of you. You trusted that your destiny is written and that you are a mere instrument to accomplish that mission. Look at your life as that mission and let go of everything else. You have allowed yourself to open your heart to people that even within their own destiny and human conditions make you a better person. You have allowed yourself to love unconditionally. You have allowed yourself to forgive unconditionally. You have allowed yourself to be how God wanted you to be.

                                                                    You trusted.
                                                                Every bit of my love
                                                                    Tania Maria

Stranger's Eyes

It's beautiful when you find your way back through the eyes of someone else. When you meet a stranger and everything they say realigns your soul back into place. Almost as if the Universe sent a messenger to pick you up and push you forward. When someone with certainty tells you their faith in you and the greatness that they perceive from you just by their own instincts without an agenda or an expectation is when your own eyes open. Their light shines at you and heals you, even if just for a minute. When you meet those wondering eyes in the world... you think to yourself that falling down was worth it. Because you yourself are the one seeing the mirror. Which means that what picked you up is only what you see in yourself. No one can save you from you. If you stood up... then you've come a long way.

Crazy

As I got out of the airplane from my vacation I felt nauseous. Was I really going to do this? On my way to the bathroom I felt the need to cry. I went in the stall with my carry-on suitcase and began to sob. I just stood there with my hands on my face asking myself if I had gone mad. I had decided to leave my jobs and everything I know in pursuit of my dream.  Putting it all out there so that the universe could help me or break me. But even that severe anxiety couldn't take away the feeling of knowing that this was the right decision for me. I was scared and I allowed to let myself be scared. In that fear I saw all my limitations. I saw everything about me that constantly holds myself back.  I began to doubt myself, my abilities, my instincts, my talents... I began repeating out loud every horrible thing anyone has ever told me about myself that I believed.  Then I remembered the present moment. I looked around and saw the stall, saw my suitcase and the toilet paper filled with fear tears. I remembered what all my guides had emphasized... "Live in the now". And for the very first time I understood it. All I had to do for now was to get something to eat because I was hungry. I didn't have to solve my life in that bathroom that day. And so I bravely took the first step to the rest of my life. I walked out of that stall.